Rumple-Idiot Worship

[Rumpelstiltskin]

Oh You're A Funny Little Red Thing
===================================
All you can do is crawl
all over walls
you silly little red spider
I guess you're a good hider
Did you realize
you look like a little
red ball
when you crawl?

[Rumpelstiltskin]

Diddly Dum
Diddley Dee
I have to go
even though
i'm not yet done
Any way
here i go
away
Cheeers
Have fun
& see
with your ears
Oops
I'm a puny
goon!
Toodleloo
I'm off
like a toff
kangaroo!

[Rumpelstiltskin]

Gosh!In the evening yesterday....i logged off & then went to change some money & all the change offices were closed i thought!Had 20 pence left!Lucky i found 1....with a good rate!Ontop of that i went to check out a party......miles away!I walked quite a distance also to get to the party.When i got there it was really,really quite!It was an abandoned house in a really posh area.The party wasn't even on!By that stage there was absolutely no transport....left....buses or trains(Xmas Eve/well it was after midnight)....so i ended up walking 7 or 8 miles across London in the cold!Gorblimey!I've had a few crap Xmases!Right now....there is also no transport......unless you can afford really heft cabs!
Years ago i got locked in my friend's house for Xmas day as he locked the door from the outside!Oh well what the heck!Next year.....i'll be onto it.....but i prefer New Year's Eve!Cheeers!

[Rumpelstiltskin]

Oh Humpty's Done It Again!
==========================
Humpty Dumpty sat on some meatballs
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
All the king's idiots
and all the king's hen
couldn't put Humpty together again!

[Rumpelstiltskin]

Mischievious Stomach Beetle
===========================
There was a stomach beetle
that lived inside a goat
It would always giggle
making the goat
throw up oats.

[Rumpelstiltskin]

The Lusty Rhinoceros beetle
============================
There was a rhinoceros beetle
that tried to have sex
with an elephant beetle
but soon lost his sex
appeal
when he heard
a dung beetle squeal

[Rumpelstiltskin]

Ring-A-Ring-A-Noses
===================
Ring-a-ring-of-roses
a pocketful of noses
Atishoo,atishoo
we all fall down
The robin on the steeple
is sneezing at the people
Atishoo,atishoo
we all fall down
The wedding elves are sneezing
the little goblins & pixies
are wheezing
Atishoo,Atishoo
We all fall down
to the ground!

[Rumpelstiltskin]

Poor Incy Wincy Spider
======================
Incy wincy spider
climbed up the crusty couch
Down came the gherkin cider
& washed poor incy out!
Out came the sun
& dried up all the champagne
so Incy wincy spider
climbed up the crusty couch
again

[Rumpelstiltskin]

Pussy Cat Pussy Cat
===================
Pussy Cat,pussy cat,where have you been?
I've been up stairs to visit a dragqueen
Pussy cat,pussy cat,what did you do there?
I frightened a little red spider under her chair!

[Rumpelstiltskin]

Just Keep On Hopping
====================
Go to the hop garden
& everytime you hop
say"beg your pardon!"
Hop
"Beg your pardon!"
Hop
"Beg your pardon!"
Hop
Beg your pardon!"
Just keep hopping
until you drop.

[Rumpelstiltskin]

Poor Peter Peter The Pumper-nickle
==================================
Peter,Peter,pumpernickle eater
Had a wife & couldn't feed her
He put her in a turtle shell
& there she felt very smelly

[Rumpelstiltskin]

Quick,quick...
file six
is around the corner
& i'm a yawner

[Rumpelstiltskin]

Oops!The thing got sent quicker than i was ready!Sometimes......ya fingers hit the wrong keys......& sometimes i lose me flippin' messages.Any way i'll point myself in the right direction......like a nimble
ninnyhammer waiting for resurrection....into....another file..really worthwhile!Cheeers!HAve you got another year....Big Ears!Oops you can't hear these messages with your eyes?Oops!

[This message has been edited by Rumpelstiltskin (edited 12-25-2001).]

[Rumpelstiltskin]

The Weird Thimble Head
=======================
There once was a nincompoop
who had too many thimbles
Everyone thought
he was a complete fruit-loop
& he was really short
of money
but still very funny
What a nincompoop
all he ate was gherkin soup!

[Rumpelstiltskin]

I Once Had A Strange Dream
===========================
I once had a dream
a witch gave me
some icecream
I looked at it
& then ate it
That was the end
of the dream