What are these stirring feelings within me?!

[Rachel Peters]

What's my freaking problem??!!

Somebody please tell me.

And while you're at it, tell me how to fix it.

Please try to be creative (with both the former and the latter).

[Evan Young]

You have finally outgrown your crush on James Bond.


"Shaken, not stirred"

[caricatureguy]

Puberty?

[Rachel Peters]

i'm teething.

nah, not yet. it's gotta be something else.

[pixiejester]

Maybe an alien is about to burst out from your stomach.

[Doctor Eric]

It could be that you've been accidentally ingesting rogaine, and you are beginning to grow, nice, young, thick, black hair in your intestinal tract.

[Butterfly Man]

hair there medicare scare

accidentally ingesting rogaine

I've done that ... that explains a lot.

[Lynneski]

Just open that drawer to the right of your bed, take two Duracells, and call me in the morning.

[Peter Voice]

Duracells are best taken with chocolate.

[gav]

I think you may have swallowed one of these




In which case the only cure would be either
a) a very strong laxitive
or
b) a very strong magnet

[Schuyler]

Calm down, it's just great music. Go with it.

[Rachel Peters]

tissues for issues.

i got issues.

i'm not supposed to have issues.
i'm supposed to be absolutely perfect.

fix them, please.

Wax the Rogaine inside belly.

Lynne, would you really like me to call you in the morning?
If you think it'll help.
How's 5am?

[Schuyler]

Rachel, post twice more and then never again. Ever.

You've almost won the forum.

[Rachel Peters]

This time the feeling is something like an excitement for something I don't know, mixed with a caffeinated twitch, a crawling under my skin (sometimes in good way, sometimes not so much), a deep loneliness for that same unexplained thing I seem to be excited about, maybe PMSy, only not really because it's missing the "MS" part, and a sort of contented, sort of not, foolish, a little worried but not nearly as much as usual, heart-achy and a mildly irritated with myself restlessness.

Could be the bad pork I ate.

[Daniel Craig]

Rachel-

I suspect you have ingested far too many honey bunches sugar lumps in the form of a sandwich.

Not only has that led to a ridiculous sugar high, but the hair in your intestines has caught the bread of said sandwich, and also within the bread, said sugar lumps. As a result, your stomach is currently fermenting a slightly sweet belgian white beer.

I expect the micro-micro brewery of Rachel Peters to market its first honey white ale soon...

"Sugar Lumps Pale Ale" perhaps? I don't know.