Arrest stories

[mini mansell]

yup, girls like Richard, because its longer

[jester]

THIS IS ONLY A JOKE

I have eaten spotted dick with custard many times. It is a beautiful steam pudding with raisins. Fantastic. It is not this that upsets the french though. I think they object to the copious amounts of lager us Brits drink on the ferry over there.

The Brits are unpopular for the same reason the US americans are even more unpopular. We are bigger then the rest of them and like to remind other nations how big we are (like bullies really) and get really pissed off if the other nations aren't entirely grateful.

The French however just hate everybody. Especially as they have offered so much refined culture to the world and all we want to know about is "Emmanuel" type cinema.

I love the french, but

[worldwidese]

French Hatred

You need to be objective. The French don't actually hate other nationalities. They just think they are superior to all others.

If they act distant to you, it just could be because of the backlash effect of the summer influx of tourists. Yeah, I know it brings in revenue to the country, but they don't think about that when they're crowded out of their favorite restaurants, or museums, or the Metro is jam packed when they try to get on it. And the traffic jams are worse.

Not to mention the decibel level of speech that is employed, by all those uncouth and excited sightseers.

In effect, the tourists disrupt their lifestyle, and nobody likes that!

[worldwidese]

Busted in Brazil.

We had a contract on a ship from Capetown to Buenos Aires, and when we hit port in Rio we decided to sightsee to the Corcovado (the hill with the huge statue of Christ)

We thought we had made an arrangement with the cab driver to take us halfway up, and we would take the cable car the rest of the way. But the guy wouldn't stop, and took us all the way up. We spoke no Portuguese, so couldn't argue.

When we got out at the top, we foolishly only paid him the agreed price for half way. So he called the cops and they arrived in the paddy wagon, loaded us in, and nearly scared us to death driving down the curving highway at breakneck speed with siren wailing the whole time.

At the Central Police Station we were put into a waiting room, and that is what we did. For several hours! The ship was due to leave at 5pm and we were getting really stressed out at the thought of missing it, and we hadn't brought enough money to buy plane tickets out, and could imagine ourselves in real trouble.

Finally, we were attended to, made to cough up the rest of the cab fare, plus court costs.

Then when we made them understand we were about to miss our ship they loaded us back into the paddy wagon, and again with siren at full blast they raced us back to the ship just as the gangplank was going up.

We sure had a lot of explaining to do to the captain about our choice of transport but it made for a lot of free drinks from the passengers who wanted to hear the story, and it saved us cab fare to make up for the money our daytrip had cost us.

[jester]

Worldwises. On behalf of the Nation of France I would like you to know that:

A: They have a sense of humour
B: They don't hate everybody.
c: Everybody else who had said anything about the french has empasised the fact that they are just kidding.

I want to reemphasise that fact now. We are just kidding. Joking. [B]Having a laugh[/B

[Doctor Eric]

ahem...

Perhaps if you were funny Jester, if that IS your real name, you wouldn't always have to point out that you are "joking."

Just a thought.

[jester]

Doctor Doctor

Yeah. Jester is my real name.... in the same way you are a real doctor...

I would rather you thought I wasn't funny than you have you think I was actually a nationalist with a thing about the French. Funny how even when I write "I'm just kidding" in bold letters and people still think I mean it and deliver a dodgy thesis that I'm not too sure I want to endorse.

Just looked at your web site. You may actually be a doctor. You haven't lit your cigarette for a start (very wise) but I'd get that exclamation mark on your face seen too ASAP.

Perhaps if you had an imagination you wouldn't need a cancer stick in your gob!

Just a thought.

[Doctor Eric]

I rest my case.

[worldwidese]

Jester Read This Please

Please go back to my thread French Hatred and you will see that I already said the French don't hate everyone-they just feel smugly superior. Plus you wrote "everyone else is joking. well, I was joking too.

But I am serious now in saying that I like the French. At one time I lived and performed in France (Folies Bergere, Olympia Music Hall and other night clubs) and at a later stage had business interests in Paris, and I never ever got the feeling that anyone hated me.

Perhaps a person's actions (loud mouth and drunken tomfoolery) are what brings out the negative reaction from the French. Vive la difference!

[jester]

Yep. I don't doubt you worldwises. I was just clarifying this in response to an email I got off somebody who concerened about the direction this was taking.

Even though I typed "I'm only joking" in bold I got a rather serious email defending the french. Not from a Frenchperson you understand, but I appreciate what they said anyway.

I am always careful when joking about stereotypes, because there are actually people out there who's limited experience of various nationalities endorses the common stereotype and we can end up endorsing their ignorance with a stupid joke. So for the benefit of those people I put a little marker up.

Putting this marker up in turn insults some of the older children on this forum who get upset and respond with a thinly disguised "why are you treating me like a child, I know when people are joking or not." Which in itself justifies the marker in my opinion.

[Prof Willie B]

I think a joke is best judged by the levity it generates, as opposed to the gravity it can cause.

You are very heavy, Jester.

Think about the Kandakandero (http://www.newperformers.net/forums/...=&threadid=980) and lighten up, man.

[Barry]

arrest stories?

hey there guys,
i wanna read about buskers getting busted. can you all work out your troubles on a new thread. cheers,b

[jester]

"All Buskers are Beggars"

In June of 2001 Salisbury District Council decided that they would ban buskers from a small section of Salisbury in a walkway past the Library.

Salisbury is generally freindly towards buskers and even quite tolerant to penny whistles with a dog on a string. In fact there is one band who turn up about once a month and the City Centre all but lays out a red carpet for them, so good they are.

Anyway. A few select councillors decided that the pedestrian walkway by the Library was not the place for buskers. At the meeting in which the ban was made they talked a lot about aggressive beggars, drunks and the noise made by musicians affecting the Library. Beggars were already banned but they would hold a mouth organ to by pass the law so it was decided to ban buskers.

This would have been okay, it was a terrible pitch anyway, but one Loony Right Winger called Francis Howard had a beef with buskers anyway. A former music teacher who thought imposition of musical taste was the same as teaching music, she relished the idea of kicking these awful people while they were down. So she made the headlines with a brilliant remark.

"All buskers are beggars!" She triumphantly proclaimed to the embarrassment of every other city councillor. Which made the front page of our local paper.

So we had a protest. Armed with a school bell, a snare drum a broken guitar and my other props I rounded up all of the buskers I could muster and (giving notice to the library) we made a god awful din for two minutes on the half hour, every half hour for most of the afternoon. The telly arrived (I got on the news because I was their leader) and the public thought it was all a laugh.

The various local characters who have been out on the streets collecting money for all manner of good causes came out in solidarity with us. Many of them have busked, grinded organs, danced and anything else to increase the tin over the years and nobody was going to dare stand in their way.

Well first of all, nobody called the police. Then when the police just happened to be passing by they came and asked us what on earth was going on. So I tried to be a little antagonistic to get myself arrested, but they weren't having any of it from the City Jester. They wished us luck and went on their way.

Francis Howard was eventually tracked down by a radio reporter but she refused to apologise for her remarks on the grounds that while her remarks were offensive they were not technically incorrect. (I'm paraphrasing but it is exactly what she meant.)

Busking is still banned from the library, but Cllr Francis Howard lost her seat at the next election. By a rather large vote.

Good buskers and street performers are welcome anywhere else in the City of Salisbury and I will gladly assist or advise anybody who would like to visit us.

[clapchap]

I lived in France for a year, before i was old enough to appreciate it. It is certainly a fine place. We all have stereotypes for each other, and when you actually go to these places, you'll find that we're all people.

Cheers,
Eric

[Peter Voice]

The first time I was arrested was … umm, maybe another time.
The second time ... umm, no, not that one either.

The fifth time I was arrested was when I’d first started pavement drawing in Melbourne, 1984. I got a busking permit that said “Performance Artist” and had been drawing for several weeks when 3 by-laws officers approached and arrested me.
I was taken to the town hall where I was told I would be charged with 17 counts of “defacing public property”. They made me wait about an hour then the Chief By-Laws Officer came to give me a dressing down. He nearly got me. My permit was little defence, pavement art was not “Busking” in his books. He threatened me with all sorts of legal hassles and then said if I promised not to do it again they would drop the charges but (and here’s where he lost me) if I was bought back to him, I might “fall on the stairs in my way in”. He then told me to get out and stay out of his patch.

That afternoon I rang a very shrewd lawyer friend and then the producer of a popular breakfast talkback radio show.
The following morning I was on air and, with only the most fleeting mention of the by-laws officers, got stuck into the council for not understanding it’s own laws and
insulting my work. I said it was illegal for the council to ban recognised street performing and that I would now be forced into unemployment. I mentioned “restraint of trade” and compensation. I questioned if my chalks were damaging the footpath and whether this would mean hopscotch was outlawed. As I had done 17 pictures around town before they nabbed me, there were a lot of people who’d seen them and they rang in with very strong support for me.

Being a very popular show at the time, it was only about 40mins later when a City PR guy rang the station. He clearly knew nothing of the incident but was certainly going to investigate. He was quite adamant that the council was perfectly within its rights to ban pavement art if it wanted to and that there would certainly be no issue of compensation. He would look into it and ring back tomorrow. He didn’t say he thought I was talking shit but you could tell he did.

Australia, like most ex-British colonies, has a multi-tiered representative government system of the Westminster model. The charter of rights and responsibilities that is the skeleton of the Westminster system is the Magna Carta. This document was the first irrevocable recognition by the aristocracy of the people’s right to elect representatives to administer public land, facilities and other interests. It also defines what is public land, facilities and interests. Furthermore it outlines the responsibilities of those representatives to uphold the principles of those definitions.
The definition of public land lists a large number of things that it must be made available for, eg transport (roads, right of ways), meeting and market-places, etc.
It also clearly states that provision must be made for “travelling performers, scriveners and screevers”. A precedent had been set in England a couple of years earlier after a dispute between a pavement artist and a council (I think it was in Bath).

The most important part of the document, though, outlines the legal rights of all people, rich or poor. Failure of an elected government in maintaining the principles of this document can mean breaking the very charter to which the government owes its authority.

The following morning the talkback segment started with the council’s PR guy who said he had looked into the matter and that pavement art was not legal within the Busking definitions and I would continue to be prohibited from working. If necessary laws would be written to specifically prohibit it. ”After all, if you let one person do it you’ll have to let others, won’t you?” he said. He then said, of course, if I promised not to do it again the Council would consider dropping the charges.
Simon came on next, explained his point and suggested if I were banned he would test his theory that they couldn’t ban any street performers, without reasonable cause, in court. They certainly cannot ban an entire genre.

The PR guy said if he fell for that sort of legal mumbo jumbo (something to that effect) he’d been in the business to long. Then he said p.art, itself, wasn’t illegal but defacing public property was and that’s what I was charged with doing.

Simon. - So who decides whether it’s p.art or defacement?
PR. Guy - The by-laws officers.
The Host – You mean the guys that write parking tickets?
PR. Guy – Yes, well, ummm.
The Host – Let’s take some calls on this now. Hellooo, Pam. What do think about by-laws officers deciding on what art we can or can’t see on the streets of our city?”

By-laws officers aren’t well liked in Aust. They’re the guys that aren’t smart enough to be cops and not fit enough to be security guards. The phone calls were great, the guy that suggested I should sue the council for libel and defamation played right into Simon’s hands.

Anyway our part of the radio show finished about 9am and a friend and I pissed off for the weekend into the desert. This trip had it’s own bizarre twist to this story but I’m having enough trouble writing this bit.

On Mon. the PR guy was proved right on at least one point. There was a new Dynamic Young Guy (DYG) from the PR department who was sure there wasn’t really a problem. Pavement art would be written into the new “reviewed” busking laws. Unfortunately this would take at least 90 days after the next council meeting to “Gazette”. The Council offered profuse apologies to me for my inconvenience and thanked me for showing them the problems in their system. He then announced he would have the charges dropped.

This might have worked except that the head by-laws officer, furious that his dept.’s judgement was being publicly questioned, decided to dig his heels in. It was a matter for the courts to decide and not the PR dept. or a radio audience. The cases were listed to be heard simultaneously the following week.

The final chapter in this farce was short and sweet. The charges were read in court and the judge called Simon and the prosecuting lawyers to the bench. He told the prosecuting lawyer that there case amounted to “vexatious prosecution” and as such they (the lawyers themselves) were exposed to “contempt of court” charges if they proceeded and lost. The council’s lawyers immediately withdrew from the case and the council then had no choice but to withdraw the charges. The judge then advised Simon that there was a “prima facie” case for counter-claims against the Council.

It did take over 6 months for the council to change the laws but I was invited to sit on the committee that made the new regulations. I didn’t sue the council and within a year they were hiring me for all nature of events. I never saw or heard from the by-laws supervisor again.

In the years since, dozens of artists have made or supplemented their income gracing the streets of Melb. with their work.

Strangely, an almost identical chain of events happened in Adelaide about a year later. The only difference being that Adelaide dropped the charges before going to court after hearing what happened in Melb.. Two other over-zealous law-enforcement officers also tried to arrest me but after suggesting that their supervisors ring the PR dept at Melb. they suddenly became very accommodating.

Then there is the story of when Andrew Elliot and and I got arrested in Surfers Paradise but that will have to wait for another time.